The Best Ever Book Of Swimming Instructor Jokes

Author : Mark Geoffrey Young
Publisher : CreateSpace
ISBN 13 : 9781478119814
Total Pages : 106 pages
Book Rating : 4.10/5 ( download)

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Download or read book The Best Ever Book of Swimming Instructor Jokes written by Mark Geoffrey Young and published by CreateSpace. This book was released on 2012-07-16 with total page 106 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: If you've ever heard a Jewish, Italian, Irish, Libyan, Catholic, Mexican, Polish, Norwegian, or an Essex Girl, Newfie, Mother-in-Law, or joke aimed at a minority, this book of Swimming Instructor jokes is for you. In this not-so-original book, The Best Ever Book of Swimming Instructor Jokes; Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who, Mark Young takes a whole lot of tired, worn out jokes and makes them funny again. The Best Ever Book of Swimming Instructor Jokes is so unoriginal, it's original. And, if you don't burst out laughing from at least one Swimming Instructor joke in this book, there's something wrong with you. This book has so many Swimming Instructor jokes, you won't know where to start. For example: Why do Swimming Instructors wear slip-on shoes? You need an IQ of at least 4 to tie a shoelace. *** An evil genie captured a Swimming Instructor and her two friends and banished them to the desert for a week. The genie allowed each person to bring one thing. The first friend brought a canteen so he wouldn't die of thirst. The second friend brought an umbrella to keep the sun off. The Swimming Instructor brought a car door, because if it got too hot she could just roll down the window! *** Did you hear about the Swimming Instructor who wore two jackets when she painted the house? The instructions on the can said: "Put on two coats." *** Why do Swimming Instructors laugh three times when they hear a joke? Once when it is told, once when it is explained to them, and once when they understand it. ***

Author : Joseph Rosenbloom
Publisher : Sterling Publishing Company, Inc.
ISBN 13 : 9780806961019
Total Pages : 356 pages
Book Rating : 4.15/5 ( download)

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Download or read book The Little Giant Book of Jokes written by Joseph Rosenbloom and published by Sterling Publishing Company, Inc.. This book was released on 1996 with total page 356 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Like junk-food snacks, this biggest little collection of jokes has so many irresistible chuckles that we can't laugh at just one... Tourist (to farmer): Lived here all your life? Farmer: Not yet. Father: Bonnie, please take the dog out and give him some air. Bonnie: Sure, Dad. Where's the nearest gas station? Enjoy jokes about teachers, parents, brothers and sisters, doctors and patients, Martians and earthlings. And groaner book-and-author lists (Sport Injuries by Charlie Hawes; Cookouts Italian Style. Plus tongue twisters, shaggy dogs, first dates, and yes, Waiter, There's a Fly in My Soup jokes. 352 pages, 218 b/w illus., 4 3/16 x 5 1/4.

Author : Eva Blank
Publisher : Workman Publishing Company
ISBN 13 : 0761176845
Total Pages : 289 pages
Book Rating : 4.48/5 ( download)

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Download or read book Jokelopedia written by Eva Blank and published by Workman Publishing Company. This book was released on 2013-04-23 with total page 289 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It’s the mother of all kids’ joke books—an all-encompassing, gut-busting, and bestselling collection of more than 1,700 jokes, tongue-twisters, riddles, and puns for all occasions. Here are 61 elephant jokes, including: What did the elephant say when he walked into the post office? / Ouch! Dozens of knock-knock jokes, like: Knock-knock. / Who’s there? / Doris. / Doris who? / Doris locked. That’s why I knocked! Plus teacher jokes and creature jokes, doctor jokes and robber jokes, food jokes, gross jokes, why-did-the-chicken-cross-the-road jokes, and name-game jokes: What do you call a man in a tiger’s cage? / Claude. And for all aspiring comedians, there are joke-telling pointers and tips, funny facts, and spotlights on comic TV shows, books, and actors, from Steve Carell to Tina Fey to SpongeBob Squarepants. It’s the ultimate gift for the incurable jokester.

Author : William Donohue
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1440583102
Total Pages : 213 pages
Book Rating : 4.00/5 ( download)

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Download or read book The Best Joke Book written by William Donohue and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2014-10-03 with total page 213 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Discover hundreds of jokes for every occasion! Why was the limbo dancer shocked when his wallet was stolen right out of his back pocket? Because he didn't think anyone could stoop so low. The ultimate collection of the world’s greatest funnies, The Best Joke Book (Period) keeps you laughing for hours on end. Inside, you'll find hundreds of jokes that are guaranteed to stir up a room full of smiles, including knock-knocks, witty puns, and one-liners. Complete with hilarious quotes from celebrities like Jon Stewart, Lewis Black, and Jerry Seinfeld, everyone will revel in each gut-busting moment. So whether you’re looking to add a few jokes to your repertoire, impress your buds, or improve your banter, this sidesplitting book arms you with the perfect joke for any occasion!

Author : Brian Boone
Publisher : Castle Point Books
ISBN 13 : 1250324092
Total Pages : 154 pages
Book Rating : 4.92/5 ( download)

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Download or read book The Grossest Joke Book Ever Written... Only Grosser! written by Brian Boone and published by Castle Point Books. This book was released on 2024-03-26 with total page 154 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: You'll laugh so hard you'll puke! Step right up and enjoy a hilarious compendium of giggles and guffaws! The Grossest Joke Book Ever Written . . . Only Grosser! is a fresh pile of hilarity that will delight any jokester and disgust all your friends and unlucky strangers. With hundreds of yucky knock-knocks and fart jokes galore, this book will be sure to ruin any polite setting, such as teatime, quiet time, or time-out. Complete with eye-popping illustrations that are gross (but not too gross), this heap of rude-ish humor and goofy gags will delight readers everywhere! - LOL about boogers, wedgies, poop, and air biscuits - Become the best comedian around with hilarious one-liners, riddles, and quips - Enjoy silly family-friendly illustrations for endless laughs

Author : May Roche
Publisher : Castle Point Books
ISBN 13 : 1250190045
Total Pages : 240 pages
Book Rating : 4.48/5 ( download)

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Download or read book The Jokiest Joking Bathroom Joke Book Ever Written . . . No Joke! written by May Roche and published by Castle Point Books. This book was released on 2018-10-16 with total page 240 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Every kid's favorite subject: bathroom humor! Inside the Jokiest Joking Bathroom Joke Book Ever Written . . . No Joke! are over a thousand knee-slapping bathroom jokes for kids, along with hundreds of silly illustrations! How can you distinguish your dad’s poop from others? It’s really corny. Why did the turd never get anything done? Because he was pooped. What do you call a kid with a bad case of the runs? Down in the dumps. Hilarious and more!

Author : May Roche
Publisher : Castle Point Books
ISBN 13 : 1250190037
Total Pages : 241 pages
Book Rating : 4.31/5 ( download)

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Download or read book The Jokiest Joking Bathroom Joke Book Ever Written . . . No Joke! written by May Roche and published by Castle Point Books. This book was released on 2018-10-16 with total page 241 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Every kid's favorite subject: bathroom humor! Inside the Jokiest Joking Bathroom Joke Book Ever Written . . . No Joke! are over a thousand knee-slapping bathroom jokes for kids, along with hundreds of silly illustrations! How can you distinguish your dad’s poop from others? It’s really corny. Why did the turd never get anything done? Because he was pooped. What do you call a kid with a bad case of the runs? Down in the dumps. Hilarious and more!

Author : Mark Young
Publisher : CreateSpace
ISBN 13 : 9781484937006
Total Pages : 106 pages
Book Rating : 4.07/5 ( download)

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Download or read book The Best Ever Guide to Demotivation for Swimming Instructors written by Mark Young and published by CreateSpace. This book was released on 2013-05-11 with total page 106 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: If you're looking to gain respect from your employees, increase your income and get more out of your friends, for you, The Best Ever Guide to Demotivation for Swimming Instructors is the book you're looking for. While The Best Ever Guide to Demotivation for Swimming Instructors appears to be parody of motivational books, many employers have used this book to get their employees to work harder and increase their standing in the community. Rather than showing you ways to motivate your employees so they'll want to work harder, this book show you how to use fear and intimidation to MAKE them work harder, and ensure that your friends give you the respect you think you deserve. Some of the ways you can use demotivation to get what you want include: *** Every Swimming Instructor knows that meetings are a complete waste of time. Make yourself more efficient by turning up at every meeting fifteen minutes late, leaving early, and popping in and out while it's in progress. *** Maintain the distance between yourself, the Swimming Instructor, and your friends by never smiling or saying hello to anybody. While this may appear rude, it's better than having to deal with their problems. *** Nobody gets a better deal at restaurants than Swimming Instructors. Before dividing up the bill, calculate your share and work out if it's cheaper to split the bill evenly, or for everybody to pay their own share. Do this every time to save the maximum amount possible. *** Install phones in every bathroom stall and above the urinals so your employees can continue working while they do their business. ***

Author : Stanley Graham
Publisher : AuthorHouse
ISBN 13 : 152460951X
Total Pages : 191 pages
Book Rating : 4.11/5 ( download)

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Download or read book Teacher’S Joke and Story Book written by Stanley Graham and published by AuthorHouse. This book was released on 2016-06-17 with total page 191 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: My original purpose in compiling these jokes was to help myself to tell them in the classroom. During the last several years of my teaching career (thirty-five years of high school sciencephysics, earth science, chemistry, biology), I was in the habit of using the final few minutes of each class to tell jokes and stories to my students. That time is usually wasted anyhow as students are thinking about leaving and going to their next class. After I began this practice, I found that they were actually looking forward to the jokes each day.

Author : Matt Haig
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 0525559493
Total Pages : 305 pages
Book Rating : 4.98/5 ( download)

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Download or read book The Midnight Library written by Matt Haig and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2023-05-09 with total page 305 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The #1 New York Times bestselling WORLDWIDE phenomenon Winner of the Goodreads Choice Award for Fiction | A Good Morning America Book Club Pick | Independent (London) Ten Best Books of the Year "A feel-good book guaranteed to lift your spirits."—The Washington Post The dazzling reader-favorite about the choices that go into a life well lived, from the acclaimed author of How To Stop Time and The Comfort Book. Somewhere out beyond the edge of the universe there is a library that contains an infinite number of books, each one the story of another reality. One tells the story of your life as it is, along with another book for the other life you could have lived if you had made a different choice at any point in your life. While we all wonder how our lives might have been, what if you had the chance to go to the library and see for yourself? Would any of these other lives truly be better? In The Midnight Library, Matt Haig's enchanting blockbuster novel, Nora Seed finds herself faced with this decision. Faced with the possibility of changing her life for a new one, following a different career, undoing old breakups, realizing her dreams of becoming a glaciologist; she must search within herself as she travels through the Midnight Library to decide what is truly fulfilling in life, and what makes it worth living in the first place.